Perspective

I got to see a movie at a theater this past weekend. It's the first movie I've seen in a theater since I was on travel last year. Of course I wasn't with my wife. That would be too much like being married. No, the wife offered to take our son swimming so that I could go watch a show. Normally, when we volunteer like that, it's so the other can get something accomplished at the house. Fix a leaky faucet, mow the yard, try to get plants in the garden so we don't spend as much on groceries, laundry. . .

You see, our son has the best nutrition we can give him, organic food, vitamin supplements that I didn't even know existed before he was diagnosed. The off-shoot of that is that he looks like a little Olympian, with the stamina of a marathoner. Swimming is one of the only activities he likes that will tire him out. Of course we have to be with him at the pool, so one of us is out of action while he swims. The other has a few set hours before the return to try and make some progress on projects at the house. We still haven't finished unpacking from our move two years ago!

We have spent so much time getting him to this level of health and still have miles to go before we finish. That's why going to see a movie was such a big deal in one way and a reminder that we still aren't there yet in another.

I miss going out on dates with my wife! I miss being able to talk about things we want to do. I miss being able to call a sitter on Friday night and going out to dinner. My wife misses being able to ride horses! My wife hasn't been to see a movie on the big screen since the second Lord of the Rings movie! We could go out after our son was asleep and see something. Made for a really easy job for the sitter. . .

Getting out to see a movie was awesome. No, I didn't see the new Indy Movie, I went to see Iron Man, but if I get a chance, I will go see the new Indy, yeah, maybe next weekend. . . Hey honey. . .

Anyway, the whole problem in a nutshell is to imagine what it would be like to have your skin scrubbed off with a dry loofah, and then decide that life could be worse. Like, you could be married to someone who believes in the "Trickle-down" theory of economics, or that fossil fuels don't contribute to global warming, or that vaccine benefits are a proven scientific fact. Heck, at least my son didn't get voted off the island! What a sick thing to do.

Follow the Money

Okay, we've established the fact that my son regressed into autism. We've established that the recovery of my son is very expensive. Hmm, I guess we haven't established that yet.

My wife and I are both educated professionals. She has an MBA and I have been working in IT and graphic arts for more than 10 years and have an AAB and a Occupational Associates Degree, (which is basically a trade certificate). Right now, I'm working, (we've swapped off every few years to allow each other a break) and I make a fair amount of money. With what we spend on my son's treatments, supplements, and therapies, we're barely making ends meet. Can't give more specifics, but we don't have a retirement plan, only have emergency insurance for my son, (haven't found an insurance plan that covers ANY of our therapies, treatments, or supplements), basic insurance for me, (free with the company I'm with, but again doesn't cover most of the things we do to stay healthy), and my wife is flying without insurance at ALL! No 401K, no IRAs, about $500 in savings, give or take, we live paycheck to paycheck.

Now, as my son gets better, we've been able to give up some of his supplements, but most of the time, we just end up having to get something new that replaces the last thing, or we have to have some other therapy or procedure that costs thousands of dollars, (he's got to have dental work done now because his teeth are having problems, which will cost us around $3000).

Okay, so we're not completely broke, but this is expensive. I've also been reading "The Chelation Kid" a comic about a family with a boy on the spectrum. They've got the same issues we've got, but are having even worse problems paying the bills!

So let's move on to the whole Biomedical vs. Genetic issue. Follow the money!

First, for those in the cheap seats, here's the issue:

On the Biomedical side there are parents that believe the Autism has a biomedical cause, namely mercury, but I'm going to expand that to general environmental toxicity or in easy words, I think we're pooping in our own drinking water. This includes mercury in ANY form, which spews from coal-fired power plants, gets used in vaccinations via Thimerisol, (hence the vaccine issue), is in all of those new efficient light bulbs, and is used in the creation of munitions for our military, (mercury fulminate). Aluminum, which is used to 'whiten' all your white foods, like cream cheese, white american cheese they use at Subway, etc. If the food needs whitened, it has aluminum or titanium, (or both) in it.

Really.

Let's see. . . oh yeah. . . antimony, used in fire retardant for furniture, including baby mattresses. . . yep yours too. Look it up. It's right next to Arsenic on the periodic table. Hell, pull out an old chemistry book, flip to that periodic table and start reading off the elements, if you can read it, it's being used somewhere in the average household. Oh yeah, arsenic, used in treated lumber to keep bugs out. I'm not lying!

If you don't believe me, start reading labels!

On the other side is the CDC, FDA, (insert lots of acronym agencies here) and Legislative and Executive Branch of our government, (they get their own mention because they have been creating laws based on information from the other agencies). The official stance of our government is that Autism is caused genetically, and that the increase in diagnosis of cases in Autism is the wider definition of Autism and a wider recognition of the symptoms.

Huh?

So, another way for the government to say this is that we are experiencing a genetic epidemic. We'll look at the numbers for the epidemic in a minute.

If it's that the recognition has gone up, why not tell us where all of the 30 to 50 year old Autistic people that should exist are hidden if it's just better diagnosis. . .

Okay, the numbers for the genetic epidemic. . . hmm. . . wait, aren't those the same numbers collected by the CDC? Can we take a peek at those numbers? No? Why not?

Most of the key people working at the CDC have come from Pharmaceutical Companies! That's like making the executives from tobacco companies pay for their own research into the causes of cancer! Wait. . . didn't we do that already?

What about putting auto manufacturers in charge of safety testing their own vehicles! Wait. . .

I know. . . how about putting the inmates in charge of the mental hospital? Wait. . .

No Hope!

That's what we were told by most of the medical establishment. The Web, on the other hand, was telling us that if we spent our money with X person or X treatment, our child would be spouting poetry within days of beginning treatment.

Ya gotta love snake oil salesmen. . .

Then you've got the groups and individuals who believe that uncontrollable bowels, fits of screaming, smacking your head against the wall for hours on end, biting yourself, biting someone else, or seizures are supposed to be acceptable? Maybe the message is a little
too obscure for me, but I'd like my son to be integrated into society.

It's okay, and encouraged to be different in our house, but when you can't function in this society, (is there another society out there?) then maybe we should be working on that integration thing.

I know my son is smart, he's got a really great sense of humor, and he's got an ear for music, (just watch him shush Mommy, who tries hard but doesn't carry a tune well). I believe that my son is an individual who is a person separate from his ASD. I'd like to meet that person.

We've spent Tens of Thousands of dollars on supplements, therapies, and treatments for our son. Some have worked for a while, some not so much, but we'll keep trying. I've seen my son's frustration when trying to communicate with us. I've seen him get embarrassed because
someone points out his liquid diet, or his nearly constant humming.

When I see children, (or sometimes adults) staring, I try to ask them if they have questions. Sometimes they do, and I answer them as best I can, in as few words as possible, (general lack of attention these days). Most of the time, they shake their heads and go back to whatever they were doing. Doesn't matter, they've still embarrassed my son. He sees and understands, but can't quite act/react to his environment.